DREAM FEEDING

DREAM FEEDING

Are you curious about what the “Dream Feed” is and if you should be giving your baby one?  Dream Feeds are great from 0-4 months and work very well for some babies, but not for all and there does come a time where the dream feed can become disruptive to a baby’s sleep.

Let’s start off with what the Dream Feed is: It is the last feeding of the day, typically before parents go to sleep, somewhere between 9pm & 11pm.  It is given to fill the baby up in an effort to get him to sleep longer… giving parents a decent stretch of sleep as well!

HOW DOES IT WORK?

Place baby down for his normal bedtime and before you go to sleep gently take baby out of their crib and give him a feed.  Babies have a natural instinct to suck if they are at a nipple and often times will not wake and you can gently place
your baby back down without disturbing his sleep. When doing the dream feed, use as little light as possible!

WHEN TO DROP THE DREAM FEED:

• Your baby starts sleeping through the night from the dream feed until at least 6:30am

• For some babies, this feed isn’t an actual dream and it does disturb their sleep and can potentially make it difficult for the baby to fall back asleep.  If this happens with your baby for up to a week, it is best to drop the dream feed and wait for your baby to wake on his own to feed him.

• Around 16 weeks from the estimated due date when your baby has hit the 4 month sleep regression and his sleep cycles have matured, it is a good idea to start thinking about removing the Dream Feed for 2 reasons:

  • Because your baby is no longer in a deep sleep all the time and is now fluctuating between different stages of sleep, taking your baby out of the crib and feeding can make it more difficult to place your baby back down without fully waking him up, causing a disruption in his sleep

  • Dream Feeds after 4 months old can cause your baby to start waking out of habit at that hour because he knows he will be fed

12 MONTH SLEEP REGRESSION

HOW DOES IT IMPACT SLEEP & WHAT SHOULD WE DO?

Around 12 months old babies experience many developmental changes, both cognitively and physically.  Many babies start becoming more verbal (and they love hearing themselves babble!), start standing on their own and some at this point have even taken a few steps.. or are thinking about it!  Because of these big changes, babies oftentimes go through a sleep regression and parents confuse this regression for their child being ready to drop from 2 naps to 1 nap, when this is not in fact true. 

Babies typically drop from 2 naps to 1 between 14 & 19 months old and you want to hold onto the two naps as long as you possibly can!

HOW IS SLEEP IMPACTED DURING THIS REGRESSION?·      

• Naps are typically the first thing to be impacted since they are the lightest stage of sleep.  Due to the excitement of new developmental milestones babies will start protesting naps, resulting in significantly short or skipped naps

• It may also result in night wakings and/or early rising. 

• On average the regression lasts 2-6 weeks

WHAT SHOULD WE DO?

• Apply your sleep training method for all night wakings until at least 6:30am

• Hold steady! Continue applying “crib hour” to both naps 1 & 2, adjusting nap 2 earlier if nap 1 is short or skipped

• Make bedtime earlier if either nap was short or skipped to prevent your little one from getting overtired 

• Don’t panic. This is a phase and it will pass!

SHOULD I SLEEP TRAIN NAPS THE SAME TIME AS NIGHTS?

I often get asked if people can tackle nighttime sleep training first and then naps.  The answer is: you should NOT approach them separately. 

3 REASONS WHY SLEEP TRAINING NAPS AND NIGHTTIME AT THE SAME TIME SO IMPORTANT:

1. If you help your child to fall asleep during the day by rocking, holding, feeding, etc. then it will send very inconsistent messages to your little one.  If you are doing the work for your baby or toddler at nap time, but not nighttime, it will be very confusing to them!

2. The inconsistencies can make it much more difficult for children to consistently put themselves to sleep at bedtime and for any night wakings

3. In order for your child’s sleep to really come together and for them to learn how to fall asleep independently, they need to learn how to fall asleep by themselves for all sleep

WHEN I BEGIN SLEEP TRAINING, SHOULD I START DURING THE FIRST NAP OR AT NIGHTTIME?

You will want to start sleep training at night, followed by naps the next day.  The reason for this is because at nighttime babies & toddlers have higher levels of melatonin being produced (making it easier for them!) and they will get more practice at night (~12 hours) vs. daytime (2-4 hours).  Naps typically take longer to come together because of the lower levels of melatonin and because it is the lightest stage of sleep and most alert time of day. 

HOW LONG WILL THIS TAKE?

Nighttime sleep can improve within 2-4 nights, whereas naps can take up to 2 weeks to see true improvement. If you are 100% consistent with your method and getting your little one down for naps and bedtime at the optimal time each day & night, things will come together!

DAYCARE AND SLEEP TRAINING

IS SLEEP TRAINING WHEN YOUR CHILD ATTENDS DAYCARE, POSSIBLE?

People always wonder if their baby or toddler can be sleep trained if they attend daycare.  The answer is YES!  Oftentimes daycares are willing to adjust certain things and work with parents who decide to sleep train their little one (after all, sleep training is becoming more and more common!).

HERE ARE 6 THINGS YOU WILL WANT TO ASK YOUR DAYCARE TO IMPLEMENT:

1. Attach a sound machine to little one’s crib or near their cot (to replicate similar environment as home and drown out the surrounding noises)

2. Send baby/toddler with duplicate comfort items that you have at home such as a breathable lovey/sleep sack

3. Ask them to NOT rock your baby/toddler to sleep or allow him to fall asleep in a swing

4. Ask that they put your little one in the crib for naps only, not for any playtime

5. See if your little one’s crib or cot can be moved to a back corner where it might be darker/quieter

6. Print out a sleep log for them to fill out so that you know when to adjust with an earlier or later bedtime

If naps at daycare are off for the day it will not impact night sleep as long as you can adjust bedtime earlier when naps do not meet their goal (1 hour minimum for naps 1 & 2 if on 2-3 naps and 90 minutes minimum if on 1 nap).   For the first several weeks, be prepared for a quick pick-up and head straight home for dinner and early bedtime.  This will be temporary until your little one is sleeping better!

And babies are smart! They understand that different rules apply at home vs. daycare.  So when your little one is home on weekends, be sure to apply “crib hour” to naps if on 2-3 naps and the “crib 90” if on 1 nap.

“What about the drive home from daycare?  My baby always falls asleep!”

Do what you can to keep your baby/toddler awake on the ride home from daycare (try opening a window or playing music).  If he falls asleep, don’t stress!  While it isn’t ideal, simply bump bedtime out just a smidge (15/20 minutes) if he caught a quick cat nap on the ride home.

If you are thinking about starting sleep training, try to do so over a long weekend.  If that is not an option, start Friday evening to give your little one a couple days of naps at home prior to returning back to daycare.

Sleep training in two different environments may take a little longer for things to come together, but as long as you are consistent at home and daycare adjusts a few things, it will work and eventually your child will be on his way to better naps and night sleep!

SEPARATION ANXIETY

TODDLER SEPARATION ANXIETY

Are you worried about separation anxiety with your little one?  Don’t be!  It is totally normal. 

Many parents experience extreme clinginess from their toddler around 18 months as well as around 2 years old and this can affect a little one’s sleep. The good news is, this is a phase and it will pass!

HERE ARE 3 TIPS FOR NAP TIME AND BEDTIME:

1. Don’t rush bedtime: Have a solid and consistent bedtime routine, 15-20 minutes max.  Little ones thrive off of predictability and consistency. It is important to continue to have your boundaries and to not give into the “1 more” (it’ll open up a can of worms!)
2. Remain calm: Toddlers can sense your tone and intention. Try to remain relaxed and positive so that your worries don’t rub off on your little one
3. Do not sneak out: This will add to your child’s fears of you disappearing. Lovingly and with a
positive tone say “night night, it’s time for sleep” and let your child see you leave

HERE ARE 6 TIPS FOR SEPARATION ANXIETY WHEN DROPPING YOUR LITTLE ONE OFF SOMEWHERE:

1. Create quick goodbye rituals
2. Be very consistent and avoid change in your routine
3. Attention: give your toddler your full attention when separating. Be loving and provide them affection, but keep it quick and leave regardless of any antics. You want to build trust when you say you’ll return, since you always do!
4. Be specific about your return using language she can understand (don’t say “4pm” because she cannot understand that"). Reference for instance: “after lunch there will be a snack, then some play time, then you’ll line up and get your coats and daddy will be waiting.”
5. Never sneak out: that will cause distrust and can exasperate the issue. Be honest about when you’re coming and going
6. Practice being apart: small stints away from the house with a sitter or grandma where your return is quicker